They say opposites attract, however, I read in a journal that within a relationship, they [opposites] do not. I was puzzled as to why this was so since I grew up thinking that, in a relationship, each should be like on a whole different scale like for example: hot-cold, and up-down.
According to psychologists, it is “unresolved problems” that attract. This means that, psychologically, human beings oftentimes unconsciously seek a partner who is a perfect counterpart that would help us learn, heal, and grow. If a couple are totally poles apart in character (desires and whatnot), do you think that they would fall for each other? I think not. It is better suited to magnets rather than to human beings. The phrase “opposites attract” also depends on how we define the word “opposite”.
For me, being “opposite” from L is having differences that compliment his, as well as similarities but we shall tackle them later. We are similar yet we are different, and we compliment each other perfectly. Here are some of the things that we are, as they say, “poles apart” from one another:
The Gym Junkie and The Lazy Bum
L is very active. He likes going to the gym when he has the time, and every Sunday he plays basketball with his friends from church. He likes those protein shakes and I would often hear him drinking the stuff (I asked!) at the other end of the line as we are talking. He is not overly muscular like this dude:
He has muscles, yes, but he is not overly buff. During our videocalls, I would often space out and stare at his biceps and deltoids. Teehee! (Am I being creepy?)
While he likes the gym, I, on the other hand, prefer to bum about. I am not into exercising as much as he does. My preferred exercise regimen/routine would be lifting: lifting a book to read or lifting a potato chip to my mouth. L would often tease me about my chubbiness and I would lamentably agree.
“Wifey, you appear more rounder than before.”
*sigh* “I know.”
He encourages me to work out more while I try to make him minimize his time at the gym. It is not because that I want him to stop, I just want him to learn how to take it easy since he still went to the gym last time he felt under the weather.
The Quiet One and The Boisterous One
Can you guess who the boisterous one is? Me! I am often loud and very talkative, most especially when I am drunk. Thankfully not that often. I sometimes jump from topic to topic in a conversation, and would talk about something (at length) about a teeny, tiny thing that has caught my attention. I was told that I could easily talk the ears off a person even if I would be speaking about a fly landing on a certain poop in the middle of nowhere. People tend to know a lot about me because I talk to much.
L, however, likes is privacy. He doesn’t share his problems even with me which is sometimes the cause of our fights. I remember we had a huge row about it because I wanted him to tell me what was bothering him at the time. I also remember pouting when he told me he wanted to have an “off limits” office once we have a house of our own.
Recently, I told him about my blog and what it was all about. He got a bit mad because I told him I was blogging about our relationship but as I explained it to him he finally understood. The only thing that irritated me during the conversation though is that he thought of me as being a “celebrity” of the blogosphere which I am not. I have a long way to go before I would even reach that level. He doesn’t like the lime light, you see.
I have learned to respect his privacy and to ask permission from him if I wanted to include photos of him in my blogs. He has learned, bit by bit, to open up more.
The Realist and The Dreamer
L is a Pisces and, according to astrology, he is a dreamer. As a Scorpio, I am supposedly a realist. However, this is not the case. He is terribly rational that I am. It is painful sometimes when he points out some flawed logic in my discussions with him. I was just trying to be entertaining. He is such a killjoy sometimes.
He keeps me from being a complete twit at times since my head is already drifting with the clouds. I help him spark his imagination and as a result, we would often have a mini role play inserted during our conversations wherein he would ask how many months our unborn child is then I would answer with a ridiculous rejoinder.
Ice and Fire
When it comes to getting angry at each other we are also different. When he is mad at me, it is like there is this huge wall of ice before me. He would just clam up, be annoyed, and shut himself in (figuratively, of course). I, on the other hand, would talk angrily (I don’t yell) and would typically argue. Pft. Typical female.
We try to have peace talks. We both wait before everything has calmed down before we try to settle an argument like the adults we are.
Aside from having these contrasts (like night and day), we both have these things in common:
We both are gamers. We both like FPS games but I am more into it than him.
We like watching Japanese animations and would often discuss what favorite series we had watched or which kind of anime was worth watching.
We have similar tastes in food. We both love Dinuguan (pronounced dee-noo-GOO-ahn) which is a stew made from pig’s blood and innards.
So these are just a few of our characteristics as individuals. Even if we have this sort of diversity within the relationship it works for both of us. So far in the 11 months (OH MY GOD! I FORGOT TO GREET HIM!) we’ve been together, we have persevered through the rough road of love. There are still more ahead and I am confident that we would get through them all.
Thank you for reading!
Quick Note: You might be all wondering why I chose the title that I have here. I was inspired also by Daenerys and Khal Drogo from Game of Thrones. Khal calls Daenerys “Moon of my Life” while she calls him “My Sun and Stars”. So sweet.
This post inspired by OPPOSITES
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